by Hazel Jane - Scotland-based Independent Celebrant

Journal

Thoughts on Magic #1

I was recounting a particularly unpleasant set of memories from my past.

‘It was hard, you know, I felt my world crash down around me and I couldn’t figure out why. But now I look back and I realise that if it weren’t for those moments, then we might never have met, so I’m at peace with it now. Maybe I’m even happy about it.’

He scoffed.

‘Do you really think you went through all that hurt just to meet me? I don’t believe that. What about the lessons? I’m sure you must have learned a lot through that experience?’

I considered his words.

‘There were plenty of lessons, sure. But the magic of meeting you is what truly made it worthwhile.’

 

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Life can be tricky. I am learning that an unignorable part of growing up is becoming familiar with the mottled shadows of the world. What once seemed black and white, right and wrong, is now a million shades of grey as I learn about human nature, politics, and the effects of money, power, love and status. We mere mortals mess up, regularly, each tragedy and failure providing us with an opportunity to learn more about ourselves, to reflect on our actions, and to slowly bring about our maturity.

While I acknowledge and appreciate all that, my heart reaches for something different.

Woven through all of this life, there is wondrous magic. It manifests in everything that is beautiful; it is what feeds the soul as those practical lessons feed the mind. It’s almost as if there are two strands within us. The trials we face teach us necessary lessons in action, communication and critical thinking, and that’s great, but these shake-ups also tend to send us to incredible people, opportunities, or places; it is in those elements that I find my joy.

Can you think back to those unexplainable instances where every seemingly random piece of the puzzle locks into place? When it all suddenly makes sense? It feels like there is something more than coincidence at work. I guess this is faith. Or maybe it’s a form of learned optimism. If you really want, you could call it an imaginative coping method. However you want to label it, it surely makes life much more fun. It makes way for the darkest days to later become light-brushed memories.

 

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Sometimes, the magic is subtle, like a small symbol of hope that finds its way to you in the middle of a rough moment. For me, this often comes in the form of a meaningful song playing innocently in a cafe or pub.

Other times, we feel blissfully overpowered - is there really anything that embodies magic more than falling love? Particularly when you are questioning your direction or journey. When I think about who I might be in 10, 20 or 50 years time, I simply hope to be someone that can still find the magic in this sometimes gloomy world.

And so believe me, beautiful man, if all of the painful twists and turns my life took to lead me to that place, on that day, were ‘just’ to meet you, then it was all worth it. And even after everything we’ve been through, all words said and unsaid, that will never cease to be true.

MagicHazel Gibbens